My method is a variation on 'get a hobby.' I played bass guitar for 15 years before I ever played with anyone else, and I quickly discovered that's like a cheat code for making friends. Bass is not as common as guitar, so is generally in demand, and it's pretty easy to get "good enough" to play with people, comparatively. (Getting really good is a lifelong journey, but you don't actually need to be really good to have a lot of fun and invites to play.) Community club jam nights where the bar for success is really low and hobbyists are just there to have fun is one of my favorite things. You can really click with people musically even if one or both of you are super awkward socially, and there's no better conversation starter than, "Your guitar is gorgeous."
I am definitely in search of friends. It's been a long-time struggle and my therapist is likely getting annoyed with my complaining all the time about my lack of social skills and IRL friends (I'm better through a screen? Except on Bumble BFF, that destroyed my confidence more than dating Bumble AND Hinge). Really excited for the rest of this series!
Okay, I would LOVE to hear more about experience with Bumble BFF if you want to share. I've always been skeptical, but a lot of success stories came through about it and other friend-making apps, so I was considering dedicating a week to it this summer.
I won't lie. I didn't use it for very long, but when I did try it, I tried to match with a few girls and they never messaged back. And no one was reaching out to me. So it felt like a wash. I don't do very exciting things (my main hobbies are reading and watching TV/movies), so I probably didn't come across well in that respect. But that's my problem with apps in general, you have to pretend you're much more outgoing and like doing exciting things in order to get the algorithm to notice you. And I'm too tired for all that.
First, this is a wonderful idea for a series.
My method is a variation on 'get a hobby.' I played bass guitar for 15 years before I ever played with anyone else, and I quickly discovered that's like a cheat code for making friends. Bass is not as common as guitar, so is generally in demand, and it's pretty easy to get "good enough" to play with people, comparatively. (Getting really good is a lifelong journey, but you don't actually need to be really good to have a lot of fun and invites to play.) Community club jam nights where the bar for success is really low and hobbyists are just there to have fun is one of my favorite things. You can really click with people musically even if one or both of you are super awkward socially, and there's no better conversation starter than, "Your guitar is gorgeous."
I am definitely in search of friends. It's been a long-time struggle and my therapist is likely getting annoyed with my complaining all the time about my lack of social skills and IRL friends (I'm better through a screen? Except on Bumble BFF, that destroyed my confidence more than dating Bumble AND Hinge). Really excited for the rest of this series!
Okay, I would LOVE to hear more about experience with Bumble BFF if you want to share. I've always been skeptical, but a lot of success stories came through about it and other friend-making apps, so I was considering dedicating a week to it this summer.
I won't lie. I didn't use it for very long, but when I did try it, I tried to match with a few girls and they never messaged back. And no one was reaching out to me. So it felt like a wash. I don't do very exciting things (my main hobbies are reading and watching TV/movies), so I probably didn't come across well in that respect. But that's my problem with apps in general, you have to pretend you're much more outgoing and like doing exciting things in order to get the algorithm to notice you. And I'm too tired for all that.